An Editor… What’s That?

We see some wild posts fly by on Twitter. “Hurry now! I’m running a deal on editing!” Yeah… those people. They fly-by-night, sounds-too-good-to-be-true, editor. Those are the ones, you need to watch out for. Everything sounds promising but it isn’t. We’re in the day and age, anyone can post anything. Anyone can set up a bogus website, claiming they are an editor. You can’t see them, face-to-face. You take them at their word. Not so fast, self-published author.

Why don’t I include traditionally published authors? Well, they normally have a team of editors. Not one, not two, but a whole team. They also normally have a team of beta readers. Self-published authors have to pay for editing from their own pockets. Not many can afford one, let alone three or more. Only a very small batch of self-published authors, can afford three or more. That’s a few, far and between.

I don’t believe you need to cheat, when you submit your manuscript. It makes no sense to me. I should hire an independent, free-lance editor before I submit my manuscript? Nope! You want to see if I know how to write, but you want me to hire someone to edit my work?You can’t have it both ways. You want the original work but you don’t want to look at the errors? Not one single writer is perfect. You ARE the publishing world who are supposed to hire these smart and intelligent editors, and yet, you released a ton of crap. Which ones? “Fifty Shades,” for one, “Twilight,” for another. Even “Sookie Stackhouse” is a complete mess. You hope people; who don’t understand writing, reads these books. I see the glaring errors from chapter one and beyond. Even “Interview With a Vampire” is a hawt mess. Do you know why they are popular? Simple. They all have intriguing and formidable characters. The story itself, sold to unsuspecting readers. And not a book that was edited cleanly. Even Stephen King’s works are muddled and riddled with errors. So much for “great” writing! You’ve already let those poor works of fiction and nonfiction on the shelf. People fell in love with their characters and bought those pieces of work.

Honey, traditionally published companies have already fucked up. Milo, anyone? They’ve already released trash that we frequently see on the shelf. To tout that we need one is a big walking pile of horse shit. But I do agree that one needs an editor, if they repeat conversations or words. They have no clue on dialogue, point of views, plots, and tenses. We can go all thirteen rounds.

I will admit that there are some really bad self-published authors. The first chapter is always a complete mess. Should we wrestle them to hire an editor? We can argue that those self-published authors makes the rest us look bad. But in truth, ALL authors make us look bad, when they publish the crap that’s been on the shelf for many years. One of those books, surprisingly is listed as a classic novel. Whoa… there! Her book should have never been touted as a classic. It was lazily written. I’m amazed how many authors are arrogant enough to think and believe, their shit doesn’t stink. Some of these authors are editors!

Your creative writing degree doesn’t give you an imagination. Whatever degree you hold; it doesn’t give you an imagination. The system is already broken and has been broken for many years. And sometimes those “editors” ramble on more than a self-published author does. They have nasty habit of including characters that shouldn’t have a chapter set for those characters. Their chapters are normally five or less sentences or one messy paragraph. Or… they have a tendency to info-dump or overwrite their books. I’ve just read three books that have overwritten their novels from *gasps* traditionally published authors.

I don’t give a shit about the flowers. An entire chapter dedicated to flowers. How they smell, how they bloom, and how they seem perky in the sun. Fuck your flowers. Fuck your paint, chipping off the walls. I want to read how your character moves from point A to point B. Do you honestly look at a flower when you go outside? Do you gaze upon those flowers for longer than ten minutes? I don’t know about you, but I’m a busy person. Yeah, we should all stop to smell the roses. But at the same time, the only scents I smell are gas, rubber, and fresh-cut grass. And this comes from a writer, who owns a dozen or more rose bushes.

No, I don’t believe all writers NEED an editor. Sometimes hiring an editor, will make your manuscripts even worse. BUT! There are those authors who are absolutely clueless. Both in the traditional and self-published world. We should lobby for better writers from both sides. Traditionally published companies should lobby more from their writers, they chose to give a contract to. It isn’t that hard to purchase a grammar book and learn how to improve those writing skills. Lazy writing is on both sides of the coin. We ALL should aspire to become better writers and editors. We should ALL sharpen our skills and produce quality works of fiction & nonfiction. I don’t want to depend on an editor for work, I should have done myself. Editors are NOT and shouldn’t be our safety nets. It is time to hold those writers accountable. Step up your game or pick a different job.

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